Shaping Our World

This morning, I started out by writing an extremely rare rant post. When I got to the end of it, I realized that the point of the thing was not really to complain about the myriad of things that aren’t quite right with the world. What I had really been working up to in that rant was the importance of realizing that we have more ability to create our own world than we often realize.

It can be easy these days to get bogged down in feelings of despair and helplessness, as the times we’re living in are full of uncertainty and turmoil. I’ll admit that for a while, it seemed to me that the solution was of almost utter isolation. Thankfully that mindset has been replaced with a deeper and firmer connection with ideals I’ve believed to be true for a very long time, but had buried in my misplaced desire for acceptance in spaces which do not fit me (thank goddess).

While I certainly am not going to be out roaming the streets among the masses of unmasked people, I have decided to ramp up my community building skills. We really can, to a very large degree, create a world which does fit us. A place to find joy, happiness, peace, compassion, and very importantly, connection. Connection with the world around us, connection with that which is greater than ourselves, connection with other people. Even in the midst of difficulty, we do have the power to do all of this.

You may have noticed that I wrote of that with a lot of certainty, and it’s true, I did. This is because I know it to be true. In a time not too very long ago, I was (mostly) walking that path. There were some kinks to work out, both inner and outer, but it was more good than not. For a few years though, I had gotten sidetracked and lost my way. There were many lessons learned, slates were cleared. In those blank spaces, new things and people have been written and continue to be written all the time.

I’ve learned the huge value of my inherent ability to have, what they called, my head in the sand. Now more than ever I know that my head was not in the sand, it was in the clouds. I’m very grateful to say that it is now climbing back up there. It’s time to return to my ideals, along with some new ones I’ve adopted and get back to creating space and community which are uplifting, compassionate, creative, and loving. Time to wipe the tears, soothe the sorrow, and tame the frustration which comes with disconnecting from our sense of power, sense of belonging, and creative spirit. The direction has been reset, and I’ll be getting back to the work (which doesn’t feel at all like work) of creating an online space which reflects all of that.

Much love,

Tracy

Late Summer Magic

On a late Summer’s evening, the sound of a trumpet beckons people to come closer

The patio filled with music and voices of happy people enjoying the night air

Twinkling lights filling the garden with dancing colors, adding to the magic

Glances across the table, a brush of a hand, an intimate whisper, secret smiles

How quickly life can change, transforming tears into hope and burgeoning love

It is moments such as these which remind us of how sweet life can be

Filling hearts with memories and desires for a cascade of the riches of togetherness.

 

Poem ~ Can’t You See

This all too quiet and empty space taunts me with questions

Why can’t you see how beautiful what we share is?

Perhaps you do, but for your own reasons you may not be able or willing to allow it

These have been amongst the longest weeks of my life, caught in the in-between

Many people feel that you are either in heaven or hell, but I beg to differ

For it seems that I am caught in both

Daring not to really hope, yet my heart still beats your name

All the while, my fear has built to a fever pitch and I’m filled with dread

Every time the phone rings and your face pops up, I feel that old excitement

Then I remember…and my body deflates…just waiting to hear the words

Which will either lift me up or tear me down, only this time for good

So much is riding on this little stretch of time that it’s terrifying

Some days, I ask myself why I continue to put myself through all of this

Especially when with each passing day, my faith in love takes another hit

When the emotional and physical toll are to the point that everything feels forced

As though I’m just going through the motions as I wait for the other shoe to drop

With every new morning, I feel more hollow as the distance between us seems greater

It all feels so unfair, almost cruel and unjust…yet I wait as patiently as I can

Because my love for you is so very strong and real that there is no choice but to wait

Until either you put me out of my misery, or I snap under the weight of my heavy heart

With each passing day, I tell myself that it won’t be long now

Which is both reassuring and dreadful at the same time

The thought of us ending before we truly had a chance to begin saddens me to the core

And the longer time stretches out, the less able I am to believe and trust in us

Is what we have enough to withstand a bump in the road and carry our love through

Back into the sunshine where we danced together so freely and joyfully?

I want to walk this road with you…bumps, potholes, daunting hills and all

Can’t you see?